Checking my emails over breakfast (high fibre bran, Innocent smoothie, Uruguay blend espresso) when I received a "poke" from McDonald (one of my lackies) via the Facebook website.
Upon further investigations, I realised that McDonald has been spending upwards of 6 hours a fucking day on that bloody site!
I went to Jessica in HR, and expressed my concerns that McDonald was wasting (my) valuable time and not concentrating on his work. Surely this was solid grounds for instant dismissal?
She laughed, told me to "relax" and that it was unofficial Corporation policy that every employee be permitted to use Facebook as part of Thommo's progressive 'Work/Life Balance: Managing Creativity Effectively' policy report published last week.
Once again, this tired, bloated, fucking whale of a broadcaster has thwarted me from exercising the kind of power that is commonplace in any indie or commercial broadcaster when dealing with the smallfry (who are deliberately kept on short, insecure freelance contracts.)
Bollocks.
At least I hope McDonald's addiction isn't as bad as someone else I have the misfortune to know: Simon Arkwright III, the Biggest Fattest Gayest man in TV.
Yesterday I received an invitation to join him as one of his 'friends' AGAIN (this was the 137th time in the past month he's tried to befriend me in his virtual world)
I have NO fucking intention of publicly declaring my friendship with this cock cheese I can assure you!!
Where does he find the time? If he was Execing one of my shows, I'd be a bit fucking concerned about the amount of time he spends on Facebook.
Mind you, it comes as no real surprise. From what I hear, Arkwright's going to be needing as many friends (virtual or otherwise) as he can get quite soon.
[Goodbye Facebook. Hello P45]
3 comments:
Not that I'd be one to encourage HR twiddling, but I heard a party in Media Centre was dismissed when xtube was found in their web browser history folder.
Drop the website into conversation with McDonald, and keep an eye on the browser history. Then, bingo! Call in HR. Job done.
And do it now as it'll be used by a lot of managers over the next few months to get rid of staff. HR will soon get wind.
TVC, shame on you!
Spotted on your (rebranded?? relaunched??) website:
"For Anthea, clearing out the pests is only part of the problem. It's a team effort and sorting out the bugs is also about sorting out people's lives as well. This leads to some lively and unexpected clashes along the way..."
This might be reality, but it's not itchy. Don't broadcast any more of your previous incumbent's commissions! Make it TVC! Make it itchy!! Make it Salopes!!!
When are you going to change that fucking shit profile pic of yours on facebook?
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