Wednesday 3 October 2007

Giving Alan Yentob head

Just woke up from a v v fucking disturbing nightmare that I feel I must urgently share with someone:

I was working late (no surprise there!) on the 6th floor when I looked up from the ninth re-write of my 'More Cuddles: The Youth Channel Rebrand Implementation' powerpoint to see Alan 'Botney' Yentob slide into my office puffing on a $1,000 La Carona 5 and a half inch cigar and looking a bit like this:


(Disgusting, I know....... to see him flout the no-smoking ban so brazenly)

The next thing I knew, he had unzipped the ample girth of his manhood from a smart Gucci suit and forced me to pleasure him for what seemed like three neck-aching hours.

The thought of this still makes me want to gag.

I could hardly eat any granola for breakfast. I'm still plucking imaginary grey beard hair from my teeth.

What can this disturbing dream/premonition mean???!

[Texted Daisy G and asked her for the number of that Polish therapist she has been seeing recently. I get the feeling I'm going to need professional help to get over this one.]

6 comments:

Anonymous said...

I can only Imagine the nodding shots you had to endure....

Anonymous said...

I'm surprised that you've got this far in TV without having such a dream before.

sootynsweep said...

and I'm surprised you've got this far in TV without having to do this in reality!

Anonymous said...

Never fear - Yentob's never really there. You were actually giving head to one of his trainee researchers...

Anonymous said...

It's couldn't have been him. He's teeny tiny.

Anonymous said...

Wow Dominic, your regular readers are worried about you.

We can't work out whether the reduction in postings is down to the massive drop-off in interest or whether it's down to your new job at Reef.

Please explain.