Wednesday 31 October 2007

Giving to charity

On my way back from last night's very successful Oxford Union speech, Anthony soured the atmosphere in Hincksy's car by reminding me about this.

The Corporation's in-house Charity Tsar has suggested that for this year's Children In Need event, all the Controllers should engage in doing something for charity. (I hear Fifi is threatening to attempt a high NRG dance aerobics session in the Canteen, in leotards and all....gulp....)

Shit.

After that unfortunate mishap shortly after rocking up at The Corporation, the last thing I need is for this to go badly wrong for me. These events are great for my media brand but a PR disaster if you fuck them up.

The Dark Lord has emailed his thoughts and says I should take a leaf out of uber agent and party monster Perry Mansell's last charity fundraiser.

Shit shit shit!

The last thing I want is for Mansell to steal my limelight. How can I do something that is edgy but doesn't involve doing anything quite so life threatening and dangerous as the Gumball rally?

And then it hit me: instead of ME doing some embarrassing stunt I can volunteer my hapless PA Anthony and he could be my figurehead in all of this.

So I have suggested to my lackie that he should do a marathon parachute jump (six times over in the same afternoon) to raise thousands for Scope or whichever charity is 'in' at the moment.

What a chance I am giving him!

[I'll be expecting Yentob to dig a lot fucking deeper than the measly £50 he only bothered to muster for Mansell's effort. I mean, how much is he paid a year??? I'll certainly be wanting him to at least quadruple that for Anthony's multiple suicide jumps.]

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

OK, this is what you must do.

Use your state of the art mobile (remember you told us about it) to video fifi yentob and the others doing their bit for charadee. Then You Tube it imprinted with your 'THREE' dog. Itchy, scratchy and multiplatform aware.

Don't forget to post the links here.