Tuesday, 17 July 2007

Fucking over Stephen Lambert

This Royal fuck-up has given me the perfect excuse to exercise a bit of fucking power over that rich cunt Stephen Lambert. No more 'Landmark Status' projects for you and Andy Goodsir for a while!!

I've decided that as from today, I will only commission from RDF *if* my newly created 'Board of Young Public Trust' sanction it. I have created what I would call a 'Red Alert List' of preferred suppliers who we need to keep a watch over. And RDF are already top of that list.

Seb Scott and Dave Gravy over at Princess are hot on their heels at number 2.

This is going to make it very, very hard for them to force anymore pisspoor ideas upon me. It also means that whenever I feel like it I can halt any future production featuring Anthea fucking Turner without any justifications to Fifi. (Phew!)

This will teach Lambert once and for fucking all to ignore me and my power at his fucking peril.

Can't wait to see their share price plummet later this afternoon!

14 comments:

Stephen Lambert said...

I made Lizzy Bardsley and I can break a jumped up
little kike like you.

Patricia Llewellyn said...

Stephen we need to get Pact onto this business - otherwise the whole industry is going to have a collective nervous breakdown. For Fuck's sake I mean - so Gordon did not really catch those bloody fish - big deal. I bet there are still some wankers around who still believe in Santa Claus!

Andrew Zein said...

Don't worry I'll get onto Alex right away. Better nip this in the bud quick...before they start looking to closely at some of the stunts we have pulled...

stephen lambert said...

Thanks Andrew...God I should have known calling a programme "Faking It" would one day give the tabloids a field day....

danielle lux said...

Well you'll get no sympathy from me Stephen - you twat. What were you thinking? It's one thing fucking over some chav from Basildon but trying to fuck over the Queen? Have you gone power fucking mad? You have put us all well and truly in the shit now.

Sebastian Scott said...

So we are number 2 on your list.

I have a good mind to come right over with our latest "TV Quick" award and shove it right up your arse whilst twisting your schmekel...except you would probably enjoy that you creep.

Yeah and Janet Street Porter is right off the table now - you'll have to find some other twat to front
"Dogging Made Easy"

andrew zein said...

Fuck, Fuck, Fuck I have just had those arseholes from The Guardian on the phone - they are digging the dirt on these two:-

http://www.dawnandrocco.com/

Shit!

They even have pictures of our crew on their site!

Why the fuck did we give a couple of middle-aged head cases like Dawn and Rocco their own TV show!

Russell T Davies said...

Hi TVC,

I know this is probably not a good time, with the witchhunt that is going on, but just wanted to put this new spin-off idea past you...a 12-week talent show to find the new Doctor?

Don't care to much who they pick because I'll have fucked off by then.

Adam MacDonald said...

Hi TVC,

Just trying to spin some daytime gold for my new bosses but know one here has got a clue!

Thinking of revamping "Take Your Pick" (but much more feral) - what do you think?

stephen lambert said...

Fucking Hell!

That bloody woman's encouraging people to grass us all up now!

http://www.broadcastnow.co.uk/broadcastnowArticle.aspx?intStoryID=170127

Pact need to put out a contract on Lisa Campbell
now!

Anonymous said...

I wouldn't worry unduly about grandstanding your whiter than white honesty panel. Even if you cock it up, you will always get the indie to fall on a handy sword for fear of commissions drying up. Go on - give it a go see what you can get them to do. You know it'll be fun.

http://entertainment.timesonline.co.uk/tol/arts_and_entertainment/tv_and_radio/article2076252.ece

http://www.broadcastnow.co.uk/broadcastnowArticle.aspx?intStoryID=170115

Anonymous said...

Hi, have you cleaned up the vomit yet? I mean, from when you opened Ariel this afternoon and chundered all over it when you saw that monumental arse-licking profile of Peter? Looks like he still has friends in high places to pull that one off! Hope the cleaners don't make a fuss!!

Anonymous said...

Dawn and Rocco! OMG!! What a pair of fucking gimps!!! TVC is just full them these days, making out on their nerdy oh-so-fucking-cool trendiness. Bleurrrghhhhhhh!! I just puked on my laptop.

Anonymous said...

oh no! what will all the half witted female execs RDF do now they don't spend their days with their brown noses up Stephen's arse...?