Friday, 13 July 2007

The Trouble with Her Majesty

1. No sense of humour

2. Smells a bit

3. Not in touch with Da Kids (unlike me)

4. I can't understand her when she speaks

5. Wears too much green

6. Does not like to polish off a bottle of Shiraz and do a couple of lines at Soho House on a friday night

7. Way too posh to 'connect' with my viewers.

I'm not in the office today but watching with glee to see Fincham take it in the neck for his Queen cock-up. I was reliably informed via the GossipBerry that Fincham and Stephen Lambert were seen sitting outside Fifi's office looking like two chastened schoolboys. Then later storming down the corridor (like Batman and Robin on the way to a crisis in Gotham) and very loudly verbally kicking three streaks of living piss out of the head of promos.

Lambert could be heard shouting things like "share price drop" and "not when I was at fucking Modern Times we didn't!" whilst Fincham just stood there scowling and clenching his fists.

Brilliant. Heads are going to fucking roll on this one!

See, this is the danger with celebrity access docs these days. The subjects are so 'twitchy' about how we represent them. Rewind five years ago and you could fuck anyone over without a problem. Even the Queen.


Anonymous said...

Bit confused by your attitude to illicit substances TVC. Here you seem to be all in favour of a bit of line-dancing at Soho H on a Friday night, but a while back when you went to that big mean rock'n'roll party you got all scared and said you'd never done drugs! Fess up now: do you or don't you?

Anonymous said...

So if Fincham falls on his sword for this Queen balls up, there could be an opening at a channel that a few people actually watch TVC!

Anonymous said...

re: point 2.

I can confirm that she smells just like everyone's nan. that Lavender/Wee mix that lingers.

HRH said...

Actually I am partial to a drop of Shiraz

Phil the Greek said...

And I'm partial to a tub full of Colombian happy powder