Friday, 1 June 2007

Perry Mansell scares the shit out of me

I had a real shock to the system first thing this morning. Picked up an email on my Blackberry from the infamous Perry Mansell whilst I was in the bath - it was all "fuck this" and "cunt that", which astonished me a little (coming at just 6.45 in the morning). He was ranting about the fact that My Channel hadn't commissioned another low budget, late-night series of Dickinson Moss getting all hot-under-the-collar about his favourite Japanese toys or something, and that he wanted "answers now, you fucking Jewish cunt face".

I didn't quite know the best way to respond, because obviously Dickinson is an MIT (Massively Important Talent) for the Corporation, but I cannot (and will not) have My Channel used as a late-night outpost for vanity pieces like this. How would Peter like it if I took 'An Evening With...' off his hands and gave him Dickinson Moss's Japanese Wankfest Weekend instead?

Once safely ensconced in my 6th floor office and enjoying the first of my many skinny lattes-on-ice of the day, I couldn't help but confess to Anthony just how shaken I'd been in the bath by the Perry Mansell mail.

Incredibly my PA smirked, and told me to ignore it. "Ignore it? Are you fucking joking?? This is the agent of Dickinson Moss we're talking about!" I shot back.

With astonishing arrogance, Anthony proceeded to pick up my Blackberry and double check the time of Mansell's original message: "Don't you know about Perry?! Look, they taped 'An Evening With...' in Studio 3 last night and so he'll have gone off afterwards to a very seedy Marble Arch hotel and spent the whole night going apeshit on coke. He was completely cained whilst writing this. Honestly, just ignore it. Because by the time he wakes up today, he certainly won't remember sending you this."

Fucking hell. I can see that maybe Anthony is going to be more of an asset than I first thought.

No comments: