Tuesday 31 July 2007

What Car are You?

This morning I seized a golden opportunity to cement my reputation as a TV maverick from the commercial sector, the young 'itchy' upstart breathing a bit of life up the stale Corporation's backside!

It'll take much more than yesterday's badly researched Media Guardian profile to bring me down!!

In the Controller Summit I decided to spice things up by playing (another) creative brainstorming game called 'What Car Are You?'

Cool-as-a-cucumber I tell my fellow controllers, "OK, describe what your channel 'feels like' as a car. Think laterally guys, it could be any kind of vehicle eg. a bus."

A rather coy Fincham says a Lexus - Expensive family car, makes a big impact, gets noticed by the right people etc etc (Yawn).

Roly says his channel is probably a Saab (how obvious can you get?!) - trustworthy, stable, fits lots of things in but isn't very flashy. Does a good job.

Entwhistle really struggled to grasp the game and shifted about uncomfortably. Then chose a Jag. (Christ! He thinks his channel is smart and upmarket!)

And me? Piss of piss. I whipped out my laptop and showed everyone the Youth Channel personified in chrome and leather: Relevant, Contemporary, Hungry to eat the road and looking fucking good baby cruising at 120mph along the multichannel highway.

(not that I would ever dare drive at such speed I hasten to add).

It also has - I point out to The Dinosaurs - a decent triple cross freq bass charging Bose soundsystem to attract The Kids.

Fifi loved me! I could tell.

[It shows I watch Top Gear from a post-ironic position!]

7 comments:

Anonymous said...

keep up the good work TVC - your blog is what keeps us sane in this world of witch-hunts and corporate lawyers.

Unknown said...

Keep hammering them

Your woman on the doorstep!

Anonymous said...

BBC1
Bendy bus - creatively unchallenging, impossible to manoevre and in the bloody way

BBC2
Rover - remembered as a jewel, now passed its best and running on reputation

BBC3
Segway HT People Transporter - apparently vibrant and forward thinking, but ultimately pointless and daft

BBC4
Bicycle - well meaning and all that, but bullied off the roads by the likes of the above

Anonymous said...

You know you've made it as a BBC TV Controller when your antics, sorry, creative management techniques, have been mentioned on Biased BBC...

Anonymous said...

I used to work at a Nissan dealership, those Zs are all over here in the states. While the Z is a very fast impressive car, all of them are driven by utter douchebags. Even more so than BMWs or Jags. It's amazing.

Unknown said...

Mark Thompson should ride a Penny farthing his thnking is that antiquated

Anonymous said...

Possible banter-y quiz show (there just *aren't* enough of these, IMHO)...

"What car is Carr?"

- Jimmy Carr - I think he'd be like a Koenigsegg or Veyron. Or a Mazda Labia.
- Alan Carr - Trabant. Looks comic; fails so often it's no longer a joke.
- Allen Carr - claims to produce zero emissions but after 2 weeks is belching fumes as profusely as before.
- Maxine Carr - No idea, but failed its MOT due to unsafe booster seats.
- Carlton Palmer - Vauxhall Carlton (oh, that's just fucking pathetic - give that one to Jupitus.)
- Lord Carrington - (this may need some more work.)
- Herbie Goes to Monte Carlo - (now I'm just confused.)