Out of the Office (with nothing to do)

Couldn't really sleep. Still buzzing about giving the go-ahead to Salopes Anglaises. Even though the factual format market is heavily saturated at the moment this could be a very interesting way into historical Paris seen through the eyes of bad girls on a binge drinking vomit-thon.

Anyway, I know that it's a Bank Holiday (which I fucking hate) so got up in the middle of the night to go and play with my Blackberry.

I had seven new messages, but the one I scrolled down to first was from Kevin. I took a deep breath and hit 'open'. It read:

Out of Office AutoReply: What's all the fuss about?

Many thanks for your email. Kevin Lygo is now out of the country at the LA Screenings. He will be back in the office on Tuesday 29th May.

For anything urgent please contact Helen Pickett at hpickett@channel4.co.uk or 077*3 321 ***.

Out of the fucking country??? What, when you've got an Ofcom crisis to deal with?! Ridiculous. It would never be like this if I were Director of Television.

I went to my fridge and poured myself a glass of organic semi-skimmed milk. "Cheers Kevin!"

In about two years his job will be mine. And he fucking-well knows it.